Today was the first real day of warmer weather. I had planned for it by having a ton of things to do in the yard, including finishing up planting roses and cleaning up beds. Today, when the pecan mulch went down, things were truly coming together.
I've decided I cannot live without some redbuds peppering the garden and so I have scouted a few great specimens at a local nursery. The Oklahoma Redbud is the darkest, almost magenta in its color. These, paired with white, are truly vintage Okie. And, the Oklahoma variety is easier transplanted in the spring...so I will add 3 to the garden this year. I have a couple of spots aching for their color.
Ellen and I had a picnic in the pergola and she showed off her new back flip...as illustrated below.
Saturday, April 02, 2005
Gardner's Journal -- Peace and other baggage
She was born in France in the last years before World War II and was able to escape by hiding away in the luggage of an American diplomat right before the Nazi conquest. Later, she returned to her home land after the liberation of France where she attended the organizational meetings of the United Nations.
She has had other aliases, such as "Madame Antoine Meilland", "Gloria Dei" and "Gioia".
She is now reigning in my garden where she stands in front of a small structure that I built from old twigs.
I carefully cut off the shoots from these twigs as a reminder that healing begins often with the pain of letting go, of having ones dead parts stripped away. Only the Gardner can remake the wayward gangly twig into a strong straight limb that can stand up under the weight of Peace.
When I planted her, I was on my knees praying. At this site I surrendered my "right" for a fair world, a just life and my own desire to take matters in my own hands.
It is my prayer that she will grace me and others with her Peace.
She has had other aliases, such as "Madame Antoine Meilland", "Gloria Dei" and "Gioia".
She is now reigning in my garden where she stands in front of a small structure that I built from old twigs.
I carefully cut off the shoots from these twigs as a reminder that healing begins often with the pain of letting go, of having ones dead parts stripped away. Only the Gardner can remake the wayward gangly twig into a strong straight limb that can stand up under the weight of Peace.
When I planted her, I was on my knees praying. At this site I surrendered my "right" for a fair world, a just life and my own desire to take matters in my own hands.
It is my prayer that she will grace me and others with her Peace.
Friday, April 01, 2005
Gardner's Journal - Sir Thomas Lipton and Sally Holmes take residence my garden
Today is Friday, April 1 and the SUN IS SHINING!
After a great work week, I am choosing to take the afternoon "off". I've been to the garden centers and loaded up on mulch (pecan mulch is prettiest and best for roses) and a few other hardy perennials. It is still too early for much planting but every day is one more day I can plant.
I have 10 more rose bushes to plant, along with "May Night" salvia which is a dark blue companion perennial that really goes well with all kinds of roses.
I was also accousted by three cheerful bleeding hearts that just needed a home in a part of the garden that gets plenty of shade.
The roses I purchased are still bare root, which are far less expensive and much easier to transplant in the garden, especially if proper preparations (can you say PEAT MOSS) is done prior to planting. With these roses, the added growth that can happen will far outstrip the original container rose that is usually three times more expensive.
I'll get some pics posted later after my afternoon to enjoy the warming sun and new plantings.
After a great work week, I am choosing to take the afternoon "off". I've been to the garden centers and loaded up on mulch (pecan mulch is prettiest and best for roses) and a few other hardy perennials. It is still too early for much planting but every day is one more day I can plant.
I have 10 more rose bushes to plant, along with "May Night" salvia which is a dark blue companion perennial that really goes well with all kinds of roses.
I was also accousted by three cheerful bleeding hearts that just needed a home in a part of the garden that gets plenty of shade.
The roses I purchased are still bare root, which are far less expensive and much easier to transplant in the garden, especially if proper preparations (can you say PEAT MOSS) is done prior to planting. With these roses, the added growth that can happen will far outstrip the original container rose that is usually three times more expensive.
I'll get some pics posted later after my afternoon to enjoy the warming sun and new plantings.
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Ancient chinese secret
One of the greatest gifts people can give one another is acceptance. Not tolerance but, acceptance. The freedom to be who we are without trying to change them. If you don't believe, try to change a rose into a tulip. Both are beautiful, but they are different. The rose will die and the tulip just wonder what the hell you are doing. -- Ancient Proverb
Gardner's Journal - Celebration
"Making a garden is not a gentle hobby for the elderly, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion. It seizes a person whole and once it has done so he will hav to accept that his life is going to be radically changed...Whatever he had considered to be his profession has become an avocation. His vocation is his garden." -- May Sarton
There are times in the garden where one is utterly alone. The sheer size of the chore ahead is so great and one's power seems so small that it seems the job cannot be done.
Yet the job is done one shovelful at a time. One plant is moved, more are born. Space is filled and the work of life in its own miraculous way, continues.
This morning my desk is littered with books of all kinds. An almost completed manuscript for an upcoming class session sits crazily in my "out box". Pencils and pens are scattered here and there. My phone started ringing this morning at 7 am...was on the phone until late at night.
My cell phone needs a rest from the overuse of the past few days, my computer is hot, hot, hot with the whir of work and with ideas. My assistants have worked hard the last few days refining, re-doing, re-working, providing me with that partnership of creativity that is so sweet and so helpful.
There are times such as this that I simply have to sit back and say, "wow". I am not a simple person. My friend Chuck says that I think too much (he's not the only one to say that, but he's right!) I have been known to give people big headaches by the sheer amount of questions that I can ask. But there are times when I just have to sit down and say, wow.
I could ask a million more questions (probably will) but the simple truth of the fact is this - God, you are faithful. You not only provided the way, you provided the strength, you provided the people, you provided the nurturing, you, in short YOU DID THIS. I was just a lucky tool, like the shovel who crunches through the hard dirt, and keeps on working.
When my world comes down around me and I lift my head and too often my fist to you and say, why, why, why...you simple take me and we go to work and you show me your infinite mercy and goodwill. You take me kicking and screaming, but you take me nonetheless.
Your love surrounds me even when I cannot see it, feel it or touch it. But today, I see it.
And I'm grateful.
There are times in the garden where one is utterly alone. The sheer size of the chore ahead is so great and one's power seems so small that it seems the job cannot be done.
Yet the job is done one shovelful at a time. One plant is moved, more are born. Space is filled and the work of life in its own miraculous way, continues.
This morning my desk is littered with books of all kinds. An almost completed manuscript for an upcoming class session sits crazily in my "out box". Pencils and pens are scattered here and there. My phone started ringing this morning at 7 am...was on the phone until late at night.
My cell phone needs a rest from the overuse of the past few days, my computer is hot, hot, hot with the whir of work and with ideas. My assistants have worked hard the last few days refining, re-doing, re-working, providing me with that partnership of creativity that is so sweet and so helpful.
There are times such as this that I simply have to sit back and say, "wow". I am not a simple person. My friend Chuck says that I think too much (he's not the only one to say that, but he's right!) I have been known to give people big headaches by the sheer amount of questions that I can ask. But there are times when I just have to sit down and say, wow.
I could ask a million more questions (probably will) but the simple truth of the fact is this - God, you are faithful. You not only provided the way, you provided the strength, you provided the people, you provided the nurturing, you, in short YOU DID THIS. I was just a lucky tool, like the shovel who crunches through the hard dirt, and keeps on working.
When my world comes down around me and I lift my head and too often my fist to you and say, why, why, why...you simple take me and we go to work and you show me your infinite mercy and goodwill. You take me kicking and screaming, but you take me nonetheless.
Your love surrounds me even when I cannot see it, feel it or touch it. But today, I see it.
And I'm grateful.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Why I Hate Salespeople
I was speaking to a friend the other day, and he was telling me about something he had purchased that was not to his liking. "I just hate salespeople", he said. "Always in your face.."
And I said, "Yeah, me too".
This might surprise some because I have been in the sales industry for over 13 years.
But I truly dislike salespeople.
But sales professionals...that's an entirely different story.
It seems that sales people have a bad rap almost as bad as attorneys and probably worse than preachers. Which by the way, in my opinion, are salespeople, only more thinly veiled.
A salesperson is genuinely someone who is in an industry or line of work for a fast buck. They are "too cool for school" so they don't get any real learning on their product nor do they care to learn much about the people in whom they serve. They are satisfied doing as little as possible to meet the needs of their clients and generally treat them with contempt. The first words out of their mouth whenever they meet someone is usually, "Let me tell you about..." When they make a mistake, it is generally because the company or the client failed, rarely them.They are glib, stylish and their shelf life in most industries -- be it sales or anything else -- is about 2 years. Their clients see them and say, "Oh great! I gotta get out of here, FAST!" In their wake they leave disillusioned clients and a nightmare for those that might share their industry.
Sales professionals on the other hand are in something for the long haul. They realize that all businesses have cycles and they both understand this and expect it. They aren't in something because it "is a great place to make money". They take time and expense and effort to learn the product line, they work to make themselves better with people. They make a lot of mistakes but learn from it. They realize the past is what can make you better as long as you don't live there. The first words out of their mouth aren't words, but generally a nod or a smile...they may not even talk that much, because they have learned the art of listening to others. They are quick to point out when a product won't match their clients needs because the only thing worse than an unhappy client is the ten people he or she will tell about their experience. Far better to miss the sale and save one's integrity. Their clients see them from afar and say, "Great! Someone who cares about me and will provide possible solutions to challenges. " Their shelf life in any organization, unlimited.
And I said, "Yeah, me too".
This might surprise some because I have been in the sales industry for over 13 years.
But I truly dislike salespeople.
But sales professionals...that's an entirely different story.
It seems that sales people have a bad rap almost as bad as attorneys and probably worse than preachers. Which by the way, in my opinion, are salespeople, only more thinly veiled.
A salesperson is genuinely someone who is in an industry or line of work for a fast buck. They are "too cool for school" so they don't get any real learning on their product nor do they care to learn much about the people in whom they serve. They are satisfied doing as little as possible to meet the needs of their clients and generally treat them with contempt. The first words out of their mouth whenever they meet someone is usually, "Let me tell you about..." When they make a mistake, it is generally because the company or the client failed, rarely them.They are glib, stylish and their shelf life in most industries -- be it sales or anything else -- is about 2 years. Their clients see them and say, "Oh great! I gotta get out of here, FAST!" In their wake they leave disillusioned clients and a nightmare for those that might share their industry.
Sales professionals on the other hand are in something for the long haul. They realize that all businesses have cycles and they both understand this and expect it. They aren't in something because it "is a great place to make money". They take time and expense and effort to learn the product line, they work to make themselves better with people. They make a lot of mistakes but learn from it. They realize the past is what can make you better as long as you don't live there. The first words out of their mouth aren't words, but generally a nod or a smile...they may not even talk that much, because they have learned the art of listening to others. They are quick to point out when a product won't match their clients needs because the only thing worse than an unhappy client is the ten people he or she will tell about their experience. Far better to miss the sale and save one's integrity. Their clients see them from afar and say, "Great! Someone who cares about me and will provide possible solutions to challenges. " Their shelf life in any organization, unlimited.
Lipstick, Kodak and other changes
A few years ago, Kodak (www.kodak.com) reported that it would no longer manufacture and sell film, but would, instead devote its research and development to new imaging innovations, specifically digital photography.
I would have loved to be in on some of those marketing meetings. Can you picture it?
On one side of the room, there would be the old guard...the men and women who had built fortunes and companies on photography from film canisters.
And on the other would be the young bucks whose visionary ideals were leading the company in a new direction.
Can you hear the discussion? Can you feel the emotion? Can you see the microcosm of life?
Kodak is a household name. Every Academy Award nominated movie was captured by Kodak film. It is a company that has your grandmother's wedding photos and the pic of your kid's first tooth all within its rolodex --- make that electronic rolodex -- of memories.
Can you imagine the courage it took to say, "we've come as far as we can go with this type of business and now its time to go in a new direction"?
I work with a company who frequently changes its product line to keep up with the demands of clients. Recently a new lineup was announced and I thought, "Oh no, here we go." I could imagine the calls I would be receiving on why their favorite "color" was no longer available.
And while I'm eager for the change of seasons and the new colors, I know one thing that is true for companies and for people -- CHANGE IS HARD.
I know the bell curve that says there are "early adapters" and there are "latent adapters" (I'm an early one, by the way). While some will eagerly accept change, others will dig in their heels and resist.
What I don't get is this -- why the christian community is so slow to see the changes of culture at odds with itself. And while I know that business and church are not on the same footing there are virtually hundreds of companies that are reinventing themselves (Kodak) whose change in direction can be felt in almost every nook of our world.
Question: Where has the christian community been? And why can't it seem to be open to learning from great examples of change that have done it quite well?
One of the big trappings of christians is that we think we've discovered something no one else has thought about. We think it is our little journey that we're experiencing and we don't want to invite anyone else to the party.
Wrong. The rest of the world has been trying to figure out what to do in a post 9/11 world a post internet world and yes, a post modern world for quite some time.
Maybe we could stop and ask directions?
Maybe the first step we can do is open ourselves up to learning from other entities that have navigated these waters before with some success.
Recently I had a discussion with a colleage on some of the changes within my company. And as I stood there I had this growing suspicion that I'd heard the dialogue before. Oh, the words and the issue were not the same but the essence was all too familar. Somewhere along the way, someone had an idea that was a good one and then that idea became a sacred being and now?Well, now that idea is as out of date as film canisters and photo labs.
Sound familiar?
But there is something I learned in participating in that discussion. And this is it: we cannot embrace the future without giving honor to the past.
Like the '60's kids who went out and joined the Peace Corp to get away from the wealth of their family...
Like my kid who doesn't like my car but depends on it to get him where he's going.
Kind of hard to criticize the vehicle that brought you thus far.
I wonder where digital photography would be had it not been for the countless innovations along the way. Indeed, the film canister served a great purpose...it was a necessary stopping place along the way. We couldn't have arrived here any other way. Appreciating that step -- and those that brought it to us -- is one way we embrace the future.
I'm not giving up my incredible digital camera for anything. And I won't be using "real" film for much of anything in the near future. Yet, how ridiculous would I look if I went around with my camera talking about how silly it was to use the old. What good could come out of using my new camera while all the while making fun of black and white photography? Really, what would the point of all that be?
Thanks to the pioneers who have engineered my life and provided structure to my journey. Where would I be without you? Like the banks of the river, you've captured the force and movement of my life and the life of my peers. But that purpose is now evolving and I'm ready to move on. I can't go foward as I was nor can I move forward without appreciating all that you've given me.
I choose to pay homage to the past without being a slave to it. I choose to move forward with deep appreciation while embracing the nuances of the future. I choose to realize that this part of the journey is only a part and at the end of my life I can only hope that there will be some who will appreciate where my journey has taken them.
Maybe they'll even take my picture.
I would have loved to be in on some of those marketing meetings. Can you picture it?
On one side of the room, there would be the old guard...the men and women who had built fortunes and companies on photography from film canisters.
And on the other would be the young bucks whose visionary ideals were leading the company in a new direction.
Can you hear the discussion? Can you feel the emotion? Can you see the microcosm of life?
Kodak is a household name. Every Academy Award nominated movie was captured by Kodak film. It is a company that has your grandmother's wedding photos and the pic of your kid's first tooth all within its rolodex --- make that electronic rolodex -- of memories.
Can you imagine the courage it took to say, "we've come as far as we can go with this type of business and now its time to go in a new direction"?
I work with a company who frequently changes its product line to keep up with the demands of clients. Recently a new lineup was announced and I thought, "Oh no, here we go." I could imagine the calls I would be receiving on why their favorite "color" was no longer available.
And while I'm eager for the change of seasons and the new colors, I know one thing that is true for companies and for people -- CHANGE IS HARD.
I know the bell curve that says there are "early adapters" and there are "latent adapters" (I'm an early one, by the way). While some will eagerly accept change, others will dig in their heels and resist.
What I don't get is this -- why the christian community is so slow to see the changes of culture at odds with itself. And while I know that business and church are not on the same footing there are virtually hundreds of companies that are reinventing themselves (Kodak) whose change in direction can be felt in almost every nook of our world.
Question: Where has the christian community been? And why can't it seem to be open to learning from great examples of change that have done it quite well?
One of the big trappings of christians is that we think we've discovered something no one else has thought about. We think it is our little journey that we're experiencing and we don't want to invite anyone else to the party.
Wrong. The rest of the world has been trying to figure out what to do in a post 9/11 world a post internet world and yes, a post modern world for quite some time.
Maybe we could stop and ask directions?
Maybe the first step we can do is open ourselves up to learning from other entities that have navigated these waters before with some success.
Recently I had a discussion with a colleage on some of the changes within my company. And as I stood there I had this growing suspicion that I'd heard the dialogue before. Oh, the words and the issue were not the same but the essence was all too familar. Somewhere along the way, someone had an idea that was a good one and then that idea became a sacred being and now?Well, now that idea is as out of date as film canisters and photo labs.
Sound familiar?
But there is something I learned in participating in that discussion. And this is it: we cannot embrace the future without giving honor to the past.
Like the '60's kids who went out and joined the Peace Corp to get away from the wealth of their family...
Like my kid who doesn't like my car but depends on it to get him where he's going.
Kind of hard to criticize the vehicle that brought you thus far.
I wonder where digital photography would be had it not been for the countless innovations along the way. Indeed, the film canister served a great purpose...it was a necessary stopping place along the way. We couldn't have arrived here any other way. Appreciating that step -- and those that brought it to us -- is one way we embrace the future.
I'm not giving up my incredible digital camera for anything. And I won't be using "real" film for much of anything in the near future. Yet, how ridiculous would I look if I went around with my camera talking about how silly it was to use the old. What good could come out of using my new camera while all the while making fun of black and white photography? Really, what would the point of all that be?
Thanks to the pioneers who have engineered my life and provided structure to my journey. Where would I be without you? Like the banks of the river, you've captured the force and movement of my life and the life of my peers. But that purpose is now evolving and I'm ready to move on. I can't go foward as I was nor can I move forward without appreciating all that you've given me.
I choose to pay homage to the past without being a slave to it. I choose to move forward with deep appreciation while embracing the nuances of the future. I choose to realize that this part of the journey is only a part and at the end of my life I can only hope that there will be some who will appreciate where my journey has taken them.
Maybe they'll even take my picture.
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Walk to Emmaus
I'm considering participating in Walk to Emmaus (http://www.upperroom.org/emmaus/whatis/). It's been recommended to me by more than a few people and I'm very intrigued by what I've learned thus far.
I found this poem today by one of my favorite poets, Mary Oliver:
I found this poem today by one of my favorite poets, Mary Oliver:
One day you finallyknew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice--
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations--
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice,
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do---
determiend to save
the only life you could save."
Gardner's Journal -- More questions
Had a thought today that keeps nagging at me. As usual, it came to me while I was out pulling weeds and transplanting roses. Seems that is the time God chooses (or I allow) for some great conversation.
My question goes something like this....if we believe that God has allowed - for reasons that I cannot fathom -- for people to be the living incarnate, manifestation of Him and His love...That is my hands, my feet, my life are to be in service to allowing others to see Him more clearly..
And if I choose NOT TO DO THAT...through whatever means -- I take up stones and sticks instead of embracing others... I assume when I should ask more questions, I accuse when I should forgive...
What difference does it mean that God is a loving God? What difference does it mean if God is hovering in his little corner of heaven?
Ouch.
I can go around and say all day long, "God is a loving God. He LOVES you!" and that would be true, but if by MY actions this isn't shown, WHAT BLOODY DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
I started mulling this over a bit over the weekend. A weekend where I was tucking in my father-in-law post surgery, I was running my kids to every conceivable activity known to man and my husband -- well, he's looking for a job.
And I was mulling this over because...no one seemed to care. No phone calls from church friends. No visits from neighbors. Everybody was doing what they do best -- which is to go on about their business.
So I had a big pity party. Poked fun at my little village of believers because they are all out beating their breasts over their most recent tent revival..."it was SOOO good..." "such great speakers..." "The Holy Spirit is really here!"
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
Until I realized that, like most accusations, the one pointing the finger has several more pointing back.
I know less and less the older I get. I thought it would be different somehow..that life's questions would suddenly unsnarl and it might be peaceful and easy sailing. Somehow that is just not how life is. I know less and less and frankly I have more and more questions. But this one thing I know...
If My God isn't a God that can be seen throught the toughests of time, if My God isn't a God that can withstand religious fads and fancies...if my God just can't have some flesh on Him from time to time and hold my hand when I cry and soothe my kids when they hurt...WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE that he might be a loving God?
None to me. None whatsoever to me.
I'm well past the age where a theoretical God is gonna cut it. Life's problems don't get any easier, just bigger and more messy. I can't just throw a few scriptures out in the morning, say a few religious sounding phrases and say, "well, that's done. God is so loving" and then I leave to unfurl my worst on those around me. To go blindly about my own life while others are hurting in theirs.
Nope, that isn't going to cut it. Not for me...and not for any of us.
I don't think I'm too different from most. I think that a loving God can be seen in many ways, but I know he must be seen in the lives of those who most call on His name.
And I've failed there -- big time. As have most of us.
God, help me to get past the desire I have for intellectual fantasies and just be practical...to just be a practical version of you. With a warm smile, an open embrace, a soft shoulder. God, help me SHOW in big and small ways that God's love DOES MATTER and that it is a practical love, an abiding love that You give. That others DO matter to you.
Help me encourage those who have lost hope. Help me encourage those who have reached their plans, seen their dreams to fruition -- and help me to be really happy for them, even when my own dreams have fallen short and I'm still miles away from where I had hoped.
Only in these ways can I live a life that matters, a life that is real.
My question goes something like this....if we believe that God has allowed - for reasons that I cannot fathom -- for people to be the living incarnate, manifestation of Him and His love...That is my hands, my feet, my life are to be in service to allowing others to see Him more clearly..
And if I choose NOT TO DO THAT...through whatever means -- I take up stones and sticks instead of embracing others... I assume when I should ask more questions, I accuse when I should forgive...
What difference does it mean that God is a loving God? What difference does it mean if God is hovering in his little corner of heaven?
Ouch.
I can go around and say all day long, "God is a loving God. He LOVES you!" and that would be true, but if by MY actions this isn't shown, WHAT BLOODY DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
I started mulling this over a bit over the weekend. A weekend where I was tucking in my father-in-law post surgery, I was running my kids to every conceivable activity known to man and my husband -- well, he's looking for a job.
And I was mulling this over because...no one seemed to care. No phone calls from church friends. No visits from neighbors. Everybody was doing what they do best -- which is to go on about their business.
So I had a big pity party. Poked fun at my little village of believers because they are all out beating their breasts over their most recent tent revival..."it was SOOO good..." "such great speakers..." "The Holy Spirit is really here!"
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
Until I realized that, like most accusations, the one pointing the finger has several more pointing back.
I know less and less the older I get. I thought it would be different somehow..that life's questions would suddenly unsnarl and it might be peaceful and easy sailing. Somehow that is just not how life is. I know less and less and frankly I have more and more questions. But this one thing I know...
If My God isn't a God that can be seen throught the toughests of time, if My God isn't a God that can withstand religious fads and fancies...if my God just can't have some flesh on Him from time to time and hold my hand when I cry and soothe my kids when they hurt...WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE that he might be a loving God?
None to me. None whatsoever to me.
I'm well past the age where a theoretical God is gonna cut it. Life's problems don't get any easier, just bigger and more messy. I can't just throw a few scriptures out in the morning, say a few religious sounding phrases and say, "well, that's done. God is so loving" and then I leave to unfurl my worst on those around me. To go blindly about my own life while others are hurting in theirs.
Nope, that isn't going to cut it. Not for me...and not for any of us.
I don't think I'm too different from most. I think that a loving God can be seen in many ways, but I know he must be seen in the lives of those who most call on His name.
And I've failed there -- big time. As have most of us.
God, help me to get past the desire I have for intellectual fantasies and just be practical...to just be a practical version of you. With a warm smile, an open embrace, a soft shoulder. God, help me SHOW in big and small ways that God's love DOES MATTER and that it is a practical love, an abiding love that You give. That others DO matter to you.
Help me encourage those who have lost hope. Help me encourage those who have reached their plans, seen their dreams to fruition -- and help me to be really happy for them, even when my own dreams have fallen short and I'm still miles away from where I had hoped.
Only in these ways can I live a life that matters, a life that is real.
More questions
Had a thought today that keeps nagging at me. As usual, it came to me while I was out pulling weeds and transplanting roses. Seems that is the time God chooses (or I allow) for some great conversation.
My question goes something like this....if we believe that God has allowed - for reasons that I cannot fathom -- for people to be the living incarnate, manifestation of Him and His love. That is my hands, my feet, my life are to be in service to allowing others to see Him more clearly..
And if I choose NOT TO DO THAT...through whatever means -- I take up stones and sticks instead of embracing others...
What difference does it mean that God is a loving God? What difference does it mean if God is hovering in his little corner of heaven?
Ouch.
I can go around and say all day long, "God is a loving God. He LOVES you!" and that would be true, but if by MY actions this isn't shown, WHAT BLOODY DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
I started mulling this over a bit over the weekend. A weekend where I was tucking in my father-in-law post surgery, I was running my kids to every conceivable activity known to man and my husband -- well, he's looking for a job.
And I was mulling this over because...no one seemed to care. No phone calls from church friends. No visits from neighbors. Everybody was doing what they do best -- which is to go on about their business.
So I had a big pity party. Poked fun at my little village of believers because they are all out beating their breasts over their most recent tent revival..."it was SOOO good..." "such great speakers..." "The Holy Spirit is really here!"
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
Until I realized that, like most accusations, the one pointing the finger has several more pointing back.
I know less and less the older I get. I thought it would be different somehow..that life's questions would suddenly unsnarl and it might be peaceful and easy sailing. Somehow that is just not how life is. I know less and less and frankly I have more and more questions. But this one thing I know...
If My God isn't a God that can be seen throught the toughests of time, if My God isn't a God that can withstand religious fads and fancies...if my God just can't have some flesh on Him from time to time and hold my hand when I cry and soothe my kids when they hurt...WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE that he might be a loving God?
None to me. None whatsoever to me.
I'm well past the age where a theoretical God is gonna cut it. Life's problems don't get any easier, just bigger and more messy. I can't just throw a few scriptures out in the morning, say a few religious sounding phrases and say, "well, that's done. God is so loving" and then I leave to unfurl my worst on those around me. To go blindly about my own life while others are hurting in theirs.
Nope, that isn't going to cut it. Not for me...and not for any of us.
I don't think I'm too different from most. I think that a loving God can be seen in many ways, but I know he must be seen in the lives of those who most call on His name.
And I've failed there -- big time. As have most of us.
God, help me to get past the desire I have for intellectual fantasies and just be practical...to just be a practical version of you. With a warm smile, an open embrace, a soft shoulder. God, help me SHOW in big and small ways that God's love DOES MATTER and that it is a practical love, an abiding love that You give. That others DO matter to you.
Help me encourage those who have lost hope. Help me encourage those who have reached their plans, seen their dreams to fruition -- and help me to be really happy for them, even when my own dreams have fallen short and I'm still miles away from where I had hoped.
Only in these ways can I live a life that matters, a life that is real.
My question goes something like this....if we believe that God has allowed - for reasons that I cannot fathom -- for people to be the living incarnate, manifestation of Him and His love. That is my hands, my feet, my life are to be in service to allowing others to see Him more clearly..
And if I choose NOT TO DO THAT...through whatever means -- I take up stones and sticks instead of embracing others...
What difference does it mean that God is a loving God? What difference does it mean if God is hovering in his little corner of heaven?
Ouch.
I can go around and say all day long, "God is a loving God. He LOVES you!" and that would be true, but if by MY actions this isn't shown, WHAT BLOODY DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
I started mulling this over a bit over the weekend. A weekend where I was tucking in my father-in-law post surgery, I was running my kids to every conceivable activity known to man and my husband -- well, he's looking for a job.
And I was mulling this over because...no one seemed to care. No phone calls from church friends. No visits from neighbors. Everybody was doing what they do best -- which is to go on about their business.
So I had a big pity party. Poked fun at my little village of believers because they are all out beating their breasts over their most recent tent revival..."it was SOOO good..." "such great speakers..." "The Holy Spirit is really here!"
WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?
Until I realized that, like most accusations, the one pointing the finger has several more pointing back.
I know less and less the older I get. I thought it would be different somehow..that life's questions would suddenly unsnarl and it might be peaceful and easy sailing. Somehow that is just not how life is. I know less and less and frankly I have more and more questions. But this one thing I know...
If My God isn't a God that can be seen throught the toughests of time, if My God isn't a God that can withstand religious fads and fancies...if my God just can't have some flesh on Him from time to time and hold my hand when I cry and soothe my kids when they hurt...WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE that he might be a loving God?
None to me. None whatsoever to me.
I'm well past the age where a theoretical God is gonna cut it. Life's problems don't get any easier, just bigger and more messy. I can't just throw a few scriptures out in the morning, say a few religious sounding phrases and say, "well, that's done. God is so loving" and then I leave to unfurl my worst on those around me. To go blindly about my own life while others are hurting in theirs.
Nope, that isn't going to cut it. Not for me...and not for any of us.
I don't think I'm too different from most. I think that a loving God can be seen in many ways, but I know he must be seen in the lives of those who most call on His name.
And I've failed there -- big time. As have most of us.
God, help me to get past the desire I have for intellectual fantasies and just be practical...to just be a practical version of you. With a warm smile, an open embrace, a soft shoulder. God, help me SHOW in big and small ways that God's love DOES MATTER and that it is a practical love, an abiding love that You give. That others DO matter to you.
Help me encourage those who have lost hope. Help me encourage those who have reached their plans, seen their dreams to fruition -- and help me to be really happy for them, even when my own dreams have fallen short and I'm still miles away from where I had hoped.
Only in these ways can I live a life that matters, a life that is real.
Monday, March 28, 2005
Summer Solstice
Today marked back to work for me after almost two weeks "off". I started the day in the garden with Dan...this is a highlight for both of us. Some people talk a lot about the flush of new love...for me, I'll take the constancy and comfort of aged love (now almost 20 years) anyday. There is a peace and a comfort found in just work alongside someone, often without having even to talk, and just "be". Dan is one of the most Godly men that walks the globe and I'm proud to call him my "best friend".
And today I saw God's faithfulness. If you work for yourself, you know that you don't just get back to the office and find work to do...often, you get the privilege to "create" that work, which is why I love working for myself. Today I was a big dismayed looking at rather SNOWY datebook...but the phone rang and my day was quickly consumed with new business and new starts. Again, the reassuring hand of God to comfort me today.
Finally, I got to talk to one of my little brothers today and we had a really good chat. Wierd how DNA works, though. I was talking to him on my cell phone while I drove into Sonic (not literally -- you know what I mean...) and was ordering my constant driving companion, a Sonic "Route 44 Iced Tea" . Come to find out..he orders the same thing... didn't know that. He gets his brains from me....
I'm considering having my first ever "Summer Solstice" Party this year. I've been reading up on this celebration and it sound like a lot of fun. I have some ideas that I'd like to try...anyway, a fun project to plan...here's a bit of what I've found...
People around the world have observed spiritual and religious seasonal days of celebration during the month of June. Most have been religious holy days which are linked in some way to the summer solstice. On this day, typically JUN-21, the daytime hours are at a maximum in the Northern hemisphere, and night time is at a minimum. It is officially the first day of summer. It is also referred to as Midsummer because it is roughly the middle of the growing season throughout much of Europe.
"Solstice" is derived from two Latin words: "sol" meaning sun, and "sistere," to cause to stand still. This is because, as the summer solstice approaches, the noonday sun rises higher and higher in the sky on each successive day. On the day of the solstice, it rises an imperceptible amount, compared to the day before. In this sense, it "stands still."
And today I saw God's faithfulness. If you work for yourself, you know that you don't just get back to the office and find work to do...often, you get the privilege to "create" that work, which is why I love working for myself. Today I was a big dismayed looking at rather SNOWY datebook...but the phone rang and my day was quickly consumed with new business and new starts. Again, the reassuring hand of God to comfort me today.
Finally, I got to talk to one of my little brothers today and we had a really good chat. Wierd how DNA works, though. I was talking to him on my cell phone while I drove into Sonic (not literally -- you know what I mean...) and was ordering my constant driving companion, a Sonic "Route 44 Iced Tea" . Come to find out..he orders the same thing... didn't know that. He gets his brains from me....
I'm considering having my first ever "Summer Solstice" Party this year. I've been reading up on this celebration and it sound like a lot of fun. I have some ideas that I'd like to try...anyway, a fun project to plan...here's a bit of what I've found...
People around the world have observed spiritual and religious seasonal days of celebration during the month of June. Most have been religious holy days which are linked in some way to the summer solstice. On this day, typically JUN-21, the daytime hours are at a maximum in the Northern hemisphere, and night time is at a minimum. It is officially the first day of summer. It is also referred to as Midsummer because it is roughly the middle of the growing season throughout much of Europe.
"Solstice" is derived from two Latin words: "sol" meaning sun, and "sistere," to cause to stand still. This is because, as the summer solstice approaches, the noonday sun rises higher and higher in the sky on each successive day. On the day of the solstice, it rises an imperceptible amount, compared to the day before. In this sense, it "stands still."
Sunday, March 27, 2005
David Sedaris: "Jesus Shaves"
I'm a huge fun of David Sedaris, humor essayist and all around funny guy. His writing is elegant while at the same time deceptively on-target..I often will laugh at one paragraph while weeping at the next. Below is an excerpt from one of his books, "Me Talk Pretty One Day" on the joy of Easter...
It was my second month of French class, and the teacher was leading us in an exercise deisgned to promote the use of one our latest personal pronoun..
Printed in our textbooks was a list of major holidays accompanied by a scattered arrangement of photographs depicting French people in the act of celebration. The object of the lesson was to match the holiday with the corresponding picture...We'd finished discussing Bastille Day, and the techer had moved on to Easter, which was represented in our textbooks by a black and white photograph of a chocolate bell lying upon a bed of palm fronds.
"And what does one do on Easter? Would anyone like to tell us?"
One students was attempting to answer the teacher's latest question when another student interrupted, shouting, "Excuse me, but what's an Easter?"
The teacher called upon the rest of us to explain.
"It is, said one student, "a party for the little boy of God who call his self Jesus and...She faltered and her fellow student came to her aid.
"He call his self Jesus and then he die one day on two...morsels of...lumber."
The rest of the class jumped in, offering bits of information that would have given the pope an aneurysm.
"He did one day and then he go above of my head to live with your father."
"He weared of himself the long hair and after he die, the first he come back here for to say hello to the peoples."
"He nice, the Jesus."
"He make the good things, and on the Easter we be sad because somebody makes him dead today."
Part of the problem had to do with our limited vocabulary. Simple nouns such as "cross" and "resurrection" were beyond our grasp let alone such complicated reflexive phrases as "to give of yourself your only begotten son." Faced with the challenge of explaining the cornerstone of Christianity, we did what any self-respecting group of people might do. We talked about food instead.
"Easter is a party for to eat of the lamb" one of the students explained. "One too may eat of the chocolate."
"And who brings the chocolate?" the teacher asked.
I knew the word, so I raised my hand, saying, "The rabbit of Easter. He bring of the chocolate."
"A rabbit?" The teacher, assuming I'd used the wrong word, positioned her index fingers on top of her head, wriggling them as though they were ears. "You mean one of these? A "rabbit" rabbit?"
"Well, sure," I said. "He come in the night when one sleep on a bed. With a hand he have a basket and foods."...
In communicating any religious belief, the operative word is "faith", a concept illustrated by our very presence in that classroom. Why bother struggling with the grammar lessons of a six-year-old if each of us didn't believe that, against all reason, we might eventually improve? If I could hope to one day carry on a fluent conversation, it was a relatively short leap to believing that a rabbit might visit my home in the middle of the night, leaving behind a handful of chocolate kisses and a carton of menthol cigarettes...
David Sedaris has written several books, including the one that this is taken from "Me Talk Pretty One Day". He is often heard on NPR.
It was my second month of French class, and the teacher was leading us in an exercise deisgned to promote the use of one our latest personal pronoun..
Printed in our textbooks was a list of major holidays accompanied by a scattered arrangement of photographs depicting French people in the act of celebration. The object of the lesson was to match the holiday with the corresponding picture...We'd finished discussing Bastille Day, and the techer had moved on to Easter, which was represented in our textbooks by a black and white photograph of a chocolate bell lying upon a bed of palm fronds.
"And what does one do on Easter? Would anyone like to tell us?"
One students was attempting to answer the teacher's latest question when another student interrupted, shouting, "Excuse me, but what's an Easter?"
The teacher called upon the rest of us to explain.
"It is, said one student, "a party for the little boy of God who call his self Jesus and...She faltered and her fellow student came to her aid.
"He call his self Jesus and then he die one day on two...morsels of...lumber."
The rest of the class jumped in, offering bits of information that would have given the pope an aneurysm.
"He did one day and then he go above of my head to live with your father."
"He weared of himself the long hair and after he die, the first he come back here for to say hello to the peoples."
"He nice, the Jesus."
"He make the good things, and on the Easter we be sad because somebody makes him dead today."
Part of the problem had to do with our limited vocabulary. Simple nouns such as "cross" and "resurrection" were beyond our grasp let alone such complicated reflexive phrases as "to give of yourself your only begotten son." Faced with the challenge of explaining the cornerstone of Christianity, we did what any self-respecting group of people might do. We talked about food instead.
"Easter is a party for to eat of the lamb" one of the students explained. "One too may eat of the chocolate."
"And who brings the chocolate?" the teacher asked.
I knew the word, so I raised my hand, saying, "The rabbit of Easter. He bring of the chocolate."
"A rabbit?" The teacher, assuming I'd used the wrong word, positioned her index fingers on top of her head, wriggling them as though they were ears. "You mean one of these? A "rabbit" rabbit?"
"Well, sure," I said. "He come in the night when one sleep on a bed. With a hand he have a basket and foods."...
In communicating any religious belief, the operative word is "faith", a concept illustrated by our very presence in that classroom. Why bother struggling with the grammar lessons of a six-year-old if each of us didn't believe that, against all reason, we might eventually improve? If I could hope to one day carry on a fluent conversation, it was a relatively short leap to believing that a rabbit might visit my home in the middle of the night, leaving behind a handful of chocolate kisses and a carton of menthol cigarettes...
David Sedaris has written several books, including the one that this is taken from "Me Talk Pretty One Day". He is often heard on NPR.
The Incredibles
We watched this tonight as a family...well done.
Forget about the Academy Award for animation...that may be, but the great part about this movie -- the dead on family dynamics. My favorite parts are the scenes with "Violet"...someone knows teenage girls...and middle aged moms.
Forget about the Academy Award for animation...that may be, but the great part about this movie -- the dead on family dynamics. My favorite parts are the scenes with "Violet"...someone knows teenage girls...and middle aged moms.
The Village Idiot Reports
AP PHOTOS -- 2027 A.D.
Congress is expected to pass on a 14. 9 trillion dollar measure they say will assist reduce the divorce rate.
The "Toilet Paper Shuttle" (TPS) bill has been argued for several weeks now and is expected to pass with unanimous support, especially among female congress members.
"This bill, allowing the installation of these services into our homes will reduce the divorce rate by 50% and cut down on teenage drug abuse" says one supporter of the bill.
Up until recently, most households were forced to purchase boxes of toilet paper for thier families use and then repurchase it time and time again. When the household ran out, then additional trips to the store were often in order.
Some families couldn't cope with the stress.
"It was the final straw", said one mother of 4 -- all teeangers -- who recently has sought counseling for child abuse. "There never was toilet paper when I needed it" she added tearfully.
Now, since the TPS has been created, this disruptive part of family life has been virtually eliminated. Storage cells, attractively built into walls hold up to 100 rolls of toilet paper and are re-stocked by the shuttle which has a variety of colors, scents in which to choose. These devices look much like the vending machines of the late 20th century. Deliveries are made routinely and families are billed for thier quarterly usage, just like a magazine or newspaper subscription.
Still, some naysayers feel that the government is overreaching. "I lugged 12 rolls of toilet paper in my day and I still do, " says one Congressman. "This is something in which the government should not be involved." When pressed however, he recanted saying, "OK, OK, my wife went to the store not me."
For others it has been a salvation.
"It has brought our family back together -- gave us hope." said one participant in a nation-wide study. The study indicated that marital stress has been significantly lowered since the installation of the TPS in many homes."
Congress is expected to vote later this week.
Congress is expected to pass on a 14. 9 trillion dollar measure they say will assist reduce the divorce rate.
The "Toilet Paper Shuttle" (TPS) bill has been argued for several weeks now and is expected to pass with unanimous support, especially among female congress members.
"This bill, allowing the installation of these services into our homes will reduce the divorce rate by 50% and cut down on teenage drug abuse" says one supporter of the bill.
Up until recently, most households were forced to purchase boxes of toilet paper for thier families use and then repurchase it time and time again. When the household ran out, then additional trips to the store were often in order.
Some families couldn't cope with the stress.
"It was the final straw", said one mother of 4 -- all teeangers -- who recently has sought counseling for child abuse. "There never was toilet paper when I needed it" she added tearfully.
Now, since the TPS has been created, this disruptive part of family life has been virtually eliminated. Storage cells, attractively built into walls hold up to 100 rolls of toilet paper and are re-stocked by the shuttle which has a variety of colors, scents in which to choose. These devices look much like the vending machines of the late 20th century. Deliveries are made routinely and families are billed for thier quarterly usage, just like a magazine or newspaper subscription.
Still, some naysayers feel that the government is overreaching. "I lugged 12 rolls of toilet paper in my day and I still do, " says one Congressman. "This is something in which the government should not be involved." When pressed however, he recanted saying, "OK, OK, my wife went to the store not me."
For others it has been a salvation.
"It has brought our family back together -- gave us hope." said one participant in a nation-wide study. The study indicated that marital stress has been significantly lowered since the installation of the TPS in many homes."
Congress is expected to vote later this week.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)