Totally boring, rocking Saturday

Cook a large breakfast, color the hair, shop online, all while listening to some new tunes. I downloaded a new album (Zero 7) and I like it OK.

Time to evaluate the spring wardrobe. I'm a bit disappointed, LandsEnd sent me a "Plus Size" catalog. I think I'll write them and give them a piece of my mind. Still,they have some great stuff at great prices. Even though they are owned by Sears, to me they are foundational pieces of a wardrobe. Great stuff at good prices, good quality to supplement the more trendy pieces. Today I invested in a new spring trench, have had my mind on getting one to go with lighter weight things. I don't enjoy coats much, but light weight coat is almost a necessity with the best part of winter still ahead.

I enjoy Dallas shopping at the Allen Outlet Mall right off 75 South. Over 90 stores and I always hit the Addidas, Puma, Reebok outlets for my kids. I hope to get Dan there during spring break -- it's only 3 1/2 hours, really closer to me than KC, so its a good alternative to the rather bleak shopping options here in T-town. The ONLY place to shop in T-town, Stein Mart and maybe Target. Yeah, like a said, pretty bleak.

I also gave myself a late b-day present and purchased Storyweaver software so that I can make some sense of the huge collection of notes, story outlines that I have at my journal. I have been inspired by a new acquaintance who is actually working on a screen play with a buddy from L.A. This kind of big thinking totally inspires me. Thanks, Chris and Lindsay.

Current book

I am also reading a novel by one of my favorite author's - Margaret Atwood - Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood...this is one funky novel, almost apocalyptic in its tone, weary fatalism and futuristic mood to it. I'm not all the way finished with it yet, but am enjoying the stretching...I'm not a big sci fi fan (or futuristic or whatever this genre might be) but Atwood is masterful in her storyweaving. I'll try to post my own review of it later.

All my favorite things -- my kids, family, books, music and writing. There, that's my life in a nutshell. If, as Atwood predicts, the future ends here rather soon, I can rebuild my life with these things.

Chocolate cake, like the kind my daughter makes, would also be nice to have.

Home

"Maybe that's all a family really is; a group of people who miss the same imaginary place."

This is one of the great quotes from "Garden State"...which I am now proud to say I own the soundtrack...am listening to it as I write this. Heady stuff.

I have been immersed in music since I've been on the road...picked up the Los Lonely Boys grammy-winning album, and dug through some of my older CD's that I've had at the bottom of my listening bag. Music feeds my soul...not always healthy food, true. But good stuff.

I stayed in Dallas with a friend, where I think I was the only 40 year old or over in a 3 mile swath. Everyone in her neighborhood is a "hottie"...young, urban, wouldn't know a facial wrinkle if they had one, well, right under their nose. I remember those days -- wouldn't go back if you paid me -- but does make one feel really ancient to be around a bunch of "under thirties".

Reaching 40 gives one the right to say "this is my life, and I'll live it how I please, thank you, even if that means that I'm not the most fashionable place, dress the most fashionably..." Wonder what 50 will bring?

Heard from an old friend on the phone on the way home...he sounded sad, and he was, I miss him.

It's just good to be home. Will turn up the stereo and bask in the lovliness of being home with those that I love.

Novel recommendation

1.

Upstate : A Novel

I was up until 3 am this morning finishing this book...and crying all the way through, which is unusual for me...maybe I was just tired, but this book (listened to on audible) was hauntingly beautiful. It had a good ending, but not a fairy tale ending, which always is more credible to me...life just isn't usually a fairy tale, so stories that end with somethings unresolved always seem more relevant to me.

At first the novel was a little too edgy, lots of language to get through, but it is about a couple of Harlem teenagers, so it is "real"...but don't read it if you are easily offended by the antics of teenagers in love.

Something that I think the book does a good job of is showing how lives that intersect -- though may not always stay in sync, still can profoundly influence. I also like the idea that the most broken in our society still have something--sometimes more -- to give to more "healthy" members. In fact, that theme has struck me several times in some other readings so I'm going to think on it more...

I have a friend in KC who is a theologian who is offering me a helping hand on some heavier, weightier things and I'm so thankful for his guidance. I have some gnarly questions that are tugging at the edge of my mind -- specifically the ideas of wealth in America and how that works -- or doesn't work -- with so many in the world living such poverty ridden lives, I've starting rethinking some things.

Tomorrow, road trip to Dallas -- really quick, and I'll be jammin to my new CD's...

Getting ready

I'm saving a lot of tracks into my computer so that I can have my favorite songs at my fingertips. I'm getting ready for the next 5 months...with a top trip on the line.

I've not yet taken a top director trip and I really want to take Dan on this trip...it's to Greece, a cruise, and we both love history, so it would be a lot of fun. Also, we're celebrating 20 years of being married this year and what a way to celebrate...free! On a top trip, with no holds barred.

So, I've been working on my plan...and its starting to take shape... it's different than I thought it would be, it's better. I am constantly amazed at how short sighted I am and how bigger things are always better...and ways that I can't always see.

I've also been working on some reading...I've been doing more readings from classical theologians (Nouwen, Watchman Nee) and current, including NTWright
http://www.hornes.org/theologia/content/travis_tamerius/interview_with_n_t_wright.htm

I don't know if I agree with all his destinations and conclusions, but that's not really the point...he has a lot of good things to say, and I'm trying to get my mind around them.

I find that when I'm immersed in music, art, writing, my life hums along better. Sometimes, I forget to feed my soul, and then I experience a poverty of spirit that is like desert in August...and all it takes is a poem, a book, an album to turn it around. God speaks in so many ways -- I see Him in great movies, great literature and in music. Not any of the "official" places, maybe, but ways that I see Him.

And yes, it does make sense that i see Him where I'm looking...and that is both enlightning and convicting.

Usher --

I went out and purchased "Usher's" new album...my favorite songs, "Caught up" and of course, "Yeah"...so I am jammin' to that new sound (for me). I still want to get Los Lonely Boys album...I dug out my Alicia Keys stuff and am re-listening to it...all great stuff and I'm really enjoying listening to my new tunes.

Valentine's Day

I'm sitting in my office surrounded by a big stuffed teddy, about 100 Snoopy cards, candy litters
my desk and flowers are sitting in a vase. I walked in and my study had been transformed
into a den of love. My husband has learned that on this day-- only two things matter...lots of chocolate and lots of flowers. He got it perfect this year...and snoopy cards were just an
extra fun touch. I wonder if I'll ever find all of them..they are hidden everywhere!

Last night my daughter and I made her first every "from scratch" chocolate cake -- absolutely
divine. It is a two-tier cake and it quite literally melts in my mouth. She doesn't like the
"sissy" box cakes, she says.

I gave a speech today for a speech contest -- and won-- my topic: Modern Love. I pulled
from over 20 years of relationships with Dan and the kids. I get to "re-do" it for a regional
contest in May -- hope the kinks are worked out of it by then and Dan can hear it.

I am basking in the love of those that mean the most to me...and it feels great. When I was young and my family was a mess, I would dream of having the kind of family that I have now...today is a good day to celebrate that gift.

Great moments from the Grammy's

Great lyrics from Kenye West:
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/kanyewest/jesuswalks.html

I'll be buying everything I can from USHER...what a great performer. http://www.usherworld.com/

My new love

Check him out..

http://gardenstate.typepad.com/zach_braffs_garden_state_/2005/02/tsunami_relief.html

Sunday before Valentine's Day

I'm getting ready to watch "Garden State" for the second time....LOVE the movie...Dan and I watched it together yesterday...he's a lot of fun to watch movies with..he always "sees" the movie before I can get the whole point of it ...and he is eloquent and understanding when he reviews the characters...always giving the benefit of the doubt. We don't always agree on the movie and their stories and he may be less charitable in some of his reviews than me, but he is fun to go to movies together.

Yesterday was a day filled with lots of funning around with kids basketball and soccer games.. fun to watch...last night was Basketball Homecoming...and it is there that I think I most experience "community" in the sense of the word...my kids are involved, we see community friends, we have a purpose, we are all joined together in one aspect...I really enjoy this about our life here in Oklahoma.