Caliente

I am getting all ready for the big Mexican adventure...ordered supplies, constantly talking to those in PV, buying more supplies.

I'm sure I'm not at all ready.

How does one enter another culture, really? I mean, especially one like myself who often can't even make sense of her own? How do you become familar with those that think differently, act differently, experience the world differently?

I don't know. I really don't. I'm sure that I am totally unprepared for so much...I may fail spectacularly. Somehow, that both terrifies and reassures me.

Mark Twain said, "Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness and many people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime."

I could not agree more. Sometimes, I am so weary of the same, blandness that populates my little corner of the world...everyone looks the same, talks the same, has the same opinion on politics, religion. It's almost unnerving, it's so american-white bread.

Next week, my son starts his own journey from home as he starts visiting colleges. Dan and I have re-done his office upstairs and he has displayed some amazing photos of the kids...I can hardly go in there and I start to cry...Nathan on my knees as a toddler, Nathan at the piano, Nathan getting ready for school...I want to ask, "where was I?"? I was there but so busy worrying about so many things that mattered so little. Sure, his backpack was ready and he looked adorable...but how could I have known I would be peering into those pics now in some desperate attempt to keep him here with me? I want him to go, but I also want him to stay - and it can't be both ways.

Time to grow up and let go...so hard.